Fox News warns that we're all going to have to sacrifice since we're, uh, at war or something

I'm not sure if Fox News is part of an international conspiracy to try to make us all lose our minds or if the Fox cafeteria dispenses lead paint in its coffee machines but the level of Cope going on, on-air, is reaching ear-shattering levels.

What can you even say about these freaks?

Oh, ok. Everybody's retirement accounts are crashing because we're at war. You can't buy eggs because we're at war. We're seeing new measles outbreaks because we're at war, and we're using snatch squads to spirit people away and send them to foreign for-profit torture prisons because well that's just the sort of hardships you gotta face when we're at war.

With who? Who are we at war with, Harris?

Is it a secret? Are we not allowed to know?

The answer, of course, is that we're at war with America. The Glorious Leader is battling to make sure all of the stuff that makes America successful is bombed into oblivion. Take that, us.

See, here's the problem with that:

We went through a major historic health crisis, freezer trucks parked outside hospitals in place of morgues, and the New American Nazi Party (aka MAGA) paraded around in outrage over having to give up anything at all. To Trump's biggest supporters, egg or coffee or car prices going up is TYRANNY, ABSOLUTE TYRANNY, and if it weren't the nation's most famous convicted felon doing it they'd be unrolling their "Don't Tread On Me" flags, strapping on rifles and headed for the nearest government office.

Oh, but now we're, uh, at war. Everyone's got to support the "war" effort. Maybe you should grow eggs in your backyard Trump Garden. Maybe instead of buying a new car, you should build one out of beer cans. Because of the "war."

Freaks.

From the White House to the panel discussion shows, it's the giddy cruelty that stands out most. Conservative pundits are reveling in The Criminal's ability to commit every crime he wants. It's so fun. It's so exciting.

That's Fox News' "The Five" mocking what turns out to have been little more than state-sanctioned kidnappings; the Department of Justice is now admitting that another deportee was "accidentally" sent to the same infamous El Salvadoran prison but is simultaneously insisting to a federal judge that oh well, it was a big oopsie but since he's out of the country now judges have no authority to order the government to bring him back.

And again, what's remarkable is that over all of it, there's this thundering rain of shittiness that coats everything and everyone in the movement. They are the shittiest people in the nation—and they love it. They think it's funny. They think torture prisons and "accidental" kidnappings and millions of children dying after US-shipped food aid is cut off is oh so very funny.

There's "evidence" that a man with a clean criminal record was "convicted" of being in a gang? How's that work, Shitmarella? What are you talking about? Are you on drugs? Are you high right now? Did you lick Donald once too often, exposing yourself to whatever's rotting the big guy's swiss-cheese brain?

We must all make sacrifices, say the Fox News propagandists. Because we are at war, in something like a war, because the dementia-addled convicted felon propped up by far-right billionaires in a orchestrated plan to dismantle American rights has decided he wants tariffs, and he wants Greenland, and he wants Canada, and he wants to kidnap people and sell them into foreign slavery because he and his pustulant hangers-on think it makes them look tough.

Just ... ew. How can any of these people live with themselves. Like, seriously, what mechanism exists in their brains that's preventing them from doing the only decent thing: jumping off of the tallest buildings they can find with a note saying "I'm sorry" tucked into their pockets.

Evil, evil people. The comparisons with Nazis are on point—it's not often you see evil performed in such a bubbling, eager fashion. Grotesqueries, one and all.